Start Cola Earlier

I just thought I'd share this ad I found online. So if you want your babies to be popular in high school, pour a little Coke in their bottles.

Since the text is tiny, I'll tell you what it says.

How soon is too soon? Not soon enough. Laboratory tests over the last few years have proven that babies who start drinking soda during that early formative period have a much higher chance of gaining acceptance and fitting in during those awkward pre-teen and teen years. So do yourself a favor. Do your child a favor. Start them on a strict regimen of sodas and other sugary carbonated beverages right now, for a lifetime of guaranteed happiness.